I Only Became An Engineer To Impress People
It’s hard for me to say that, but it’s true. And I honestly didn’t admit it until this year.
I became an engineer because I felt I had to hit an incredibly high standard. A “normal” degree just wouldn’t cut it... I had to be a Doctor... architect... or something of the sort. When you are the “golden child” it would seem that life is so easy... but it’s really not true.
Failure was an incredibly scary concept for me that I didn’t want to experience.
I left high school with a full ride to any school in Tennessee that I could get into. I ended up walking away from it... making dumb choices for a boy and even took a semester off (sound familiar to anyone else?). But I worked hard, I hustled, and went to 4 different schools and still ended college with an electrical engineering degree.
All so I could say is “I am smart, I am worthy, and I am impressive”. So my family could be proud and put me on that pedestal. So I could live up to who I thought I had to be.
I honestly can’t find one part of me that did it for me. The only think I knew was that it would land me a good job in a field where women are few and far between.
My ego and desire to make others happy has outweighed so many decisions in my life.
A massive weight that has lifted now that I realize this. Living to impress others is short lived and doesn’t bring happiness. Following your heart is what does that. God doesn’t care about our accolades. Thank freaking goodness.
You are worthy just as you are. And so am I.
So if you are working hard to impress someone today, I pray you pause and make sure you are being true to you.